Recall one of the genre’s preëminent cautionary tales, the 2014 piece that announced the return of the monocle as a men’s fashion item but failed to find more than one dude who would actually cop to wearing one, which is still one more monocle-wearing dude than I’ve ever seen. On the one hand, voluntarily paying for your date’s three-dollar drink, as one of the men in question did, only to demand reimbursement the next day is an act of pure pettiness.So the Venmo exposé may be just another report about a thing that isn’t a thing. The fails to mention which emojis were used to call in that particular debt, but let’s assume we’re looking at the tequila-sunrise glass paired with the smiley face with a dollar bill for eyes and tongue, the better to add insult to injury.Using dating apps and the endless stream of first dates that follows can be exhausting - and everyone has their own ways of getting through the hell of it all.

Contrast Grindr’s success with that of Blendr: the founders weren’t willing to disclose the number of users, opting instead to send me an anodyne statement that they “are thrilled with the pace of Blendr’s growth,” which, they say, “was faster in the first six months of launch than Grindr’s adoption rate during its first six months.” The company declined to say how many of those users are actually, well, using the app.

If my own reaction is any indication, it’s no wonder.

It mattered a great deal that he had targeted a gay night club and, in ways still to be illuminated, that it was one he himself had reportedly visited.

It mattered that his father claimed that Mateen had been enraged by the sight of two men kissing but that, as it emerged this week, he had apparently made use of an online dating app for gay men.

and sometimes immediately regret that month you spent messaging every day.

Plus, one third of people on online dating never meet up with anyone they meet online. “Honestly, it’s not unusual to ask for drinks in literally the first message,” Leslie*, 30, from New York, tells It'll help cushion the blow when you realise you've invested a lot of time in someone you're not interested in. “I never plan on a first dating being longer than a hour,” Kelsey,* 28, says.

In the toxic brew of background details about Mateen, this might not seem like the most salient.

Surely more relevant was the fact that he felt some sort of identification with terrorists and with .

The couple had met online, and she had moved to Florida to marry him, but the beatings began almost immediately, and he was soon preventing her from speaking to her family, “keeping me hostage from them,” she said.