I would argue that dating someone with a chronic illness is in fact a GOOD thing, their level of empathy and sympathy in my experience is much higher than those who haven’t had the battles that have come with chronic illness.

Dating is difficult under the best of circumstances. To answer these and other relationship questions, Creaky Joints, the arthritis advocacy group, asked its thousands of Facebook followers for dating advice. Deciding when to tell a potential date that you have a chronic illness can be a tough call: Do you tell the person right away so that it is not a surprise?

What happens when a chronic illness such as rheumatoid arthritis (RA) is added to the mix? Do you wait until you know the person better and can anticipate a reaction?

It bothered me and I tried to think back to every man that I ever dated or even spent time with, and I didn’t want to continue this apparent pattern.

I finally figured it out, and lovingly, or jokingly (depending on who I am talking to) refer to it as “The Lupus Dating Game”.

Community member Andrea Mamun says: “Meeting online takes the inhibition out of the mix.

It’s easier putting it out in writing than in person.” Nancy Hunt-Mc Donald agrees that sharing online is a great option and suggests telling a potential date right away: “If they can’t accept you the way you are, then you haven’t really invested too much of yourself in the relationship.” Mary Ellen Rotolo puts her health status in her online profile, noting that RA is not something she could hide in person.

Ruth loved it when one day I came in to see her and brought her a teaspoon, the extra spoon she needed to give me a hug.

It’s not fair, and most importantly not true for someone with a chronic illness to think that they’re not good enough to be with somebody who is medically fit and well.

Today, we are going to address a common concern for many people dating while living with illness et al, sharing your story…

How often do you have conversations that start like this?

“I wear a ring splint, limp when I walk, and get very stiff from sitting,” she says.